Passion is a beautiful thing when used well. Too often, though, passion causes us to be dogmatic where dogma is inappropriate, it causes us to lose sight of what is really important, or it causes us needless pain. The passion of Christ is the ultimate form of passion: a love so devoted, so forgiving, so extraordinary, love in the truest sense of the word, lived even unto death. How many things in life should we be that passionate about? It’s a question we should always bear in mind because we can easily become dogmatic about things pertaining to homesteading (or anything in life), to the detriment of our sanity, our relationships, and ultimately our souls. We need to be able to give ourselves grace as we work towards a sanctified life.

I would love to grow and prepare all of my own food. I know that there is a lot of processed junk in our food: untold fillers, colors, flavors, sweetners… Yes, I do believe society needs to reevaluate how we eat, and I wish I could cook all of our food from scratch. But I’m not there yet. I can’t cook all of our own food. I can’t even grow all of our own food. I do really wish I could say otherwise. I say that as I type this from a table at a restaurant. I want to do better. I want to set a good example. But I also face an incredible amount of limitations. Right now, I have no place I can go to have some quiet time with my thoughts, so I sometimes sit in the restaurant with my headphones on so I can tune out everything else and be alone with my thoughts. If I don’t carve out time for myself, I get stressed and cranky. I get headaches and I get resentful. Nobody in our family needs that. They need a mother who is present mentally and emotionally. If I need a break once in a while to make that a reality, then so be it. If I had a better alternate location to have quiet and do the things I need to do, I wouldn’t come to the restaurant, but that’s a dream 10 years in the making, and I’m still waiting. We’re not there yet.

I’ve wanted a milk cow for years, but we still aren’t ready to own one. I could get frustrated with myself or my family that we still aren’t ready, but it wouldn’t do us any good. At times we’ve at least been able to get a hold of raw milk, but it’s not on the grocery budget right now, and I don’t have the time to travel to get it. If I spent my free time scrolling social media and watching other homesteaders with their milk cows, I could become envious or disheartened, and I’d have to remind myself that it’s okay to not do that right now. A good friend of the family said that they love that we’ve made our own bread from wheat we’ve grown, but that we aren’t so dogmatic about making our own bread that we can’t have storebought bread or that we’d get upset and stressed out and cause conflict in the family because we need to make the bread right now. We accept where we are at in life and do the best we can. Sometimes we’re able to do all the things and I feel on top of the world. But that’s usually followed by a day (or more) of struggling to get the basics done.

We all need to just do the best with where we are at right now. We can strive for growth, we can strive for the ideal, and we should push ourselves. But if these things cause damage to our relationships, if they cause us to lose sleep or become envious or frustrated, then we need to reconsider our choices through the lens of grace. God doesn’t expect us to do it all, do it perfectly, and do it now. It reminds me of a conversation with one of my good friends. As we’ve grown in faith, we’ve seen all of the different devotions and sacramentals and all of the wonderful things that our Catholic faith has to offer. We’d love to do more. We’d love to be “living saints,” but there are limitations that we face. I can’t always go to Mass during the week, as much as I would love to. I can’t fit every devotion into my schedule. I can’t read the Bible as much as I would like to. I can and I do pray for the grace to do certain things I feel strongly about, but I also have to accept when God tells me that this is not the season of my life for that. I’m not strong enough yet. I don’t have the time for that right now. This thing might be good, but that doesn’t mean it’s good for me.

We can strive for the ideal, and we can help teach others about what we learn in the hopes of having some effect on the greater world

I hope you feel passionately about homesteading or gardening or something good in your life. I hope you pursue it with vigor. But I also hope that you know that it’s okay if you are struggling to keep the house clean, to cook all of your meals from scratch, to learn a new skill… Remember where you came from. Remember how much you’ve grown. Our ancestors might have done these things more naturally, but it’s because they grew up with it. How much that you do with your family as homesteaders is new to you? It takes time to grow and develop. Keep the passion, and give yourself grace. God understands

I pray you find peace in the waiting and that you embrace the opportunity to grow in virtue.

In Christ,
Danielle